- With the right strategies, you can manage how you feel
Successful people behave in successful ways. This means doing what you need to do, regardless of how you feel.
Understanding how you feel and why you feel that way, is the first step. Unless you (as opposed to family members, advertisers, companies and governments) control of your actions, you cannot succeed! If you run away when you are anxious, instead of sorting out what you need to do, you cannot succeed. True emotional intelligence means you understand the way you feel, and why you feel that way. You understand that it is just a feeling and that you have to act despite the way you feel.
People tend to worship feelings. Not like my Grandmother who used to say,
"Sticks and stones can break my bones,
but words will never hurt me!"
These days, damaged feelings have a price, especially in the High Court. Compensation for hurt feelings and a damaged reputation can be worth more than life or limb.
How did that happen?
Someone whose emotions are running their life is a lost soul. Someone who has lost a limb, with good emotional intelligence, and an ability to make the most of whatever happens to them can be successful. WIthout good emotional health, a person is condemned to life as a victim. I do not agree that someone with emotional damage to be compensated more than someone with physical damage. But I can understand that they may be more disabled. The answer - better emotional education!
MoodMapping helps develop emotional and social intelligence. It is no fun being anxious, not compare to the sense of satisfaction that comes from sorting out problems and making a success of whatever life throws at you.
Top left (high negative energy) on the Miller Mood Map represents ANXIETY, Top Right (high positive energy) represents ACTION - doing what you need to do, to sort out the problem. For example, you are concerned about a leak in the roof, you make a plan and you either get onto the roof yourself or get a roofer to sort the problem out. You have taken action and the result solves your problem. Not all problems are so easily sorted, but letting them mount up will not help.
The more problems you solve, the greater your mental fitness to solve more problems. If you do the mental equivalent of spending your life in bed, problems increase.
A word of warning! People get stressed more easily when they are tired and in pain! - especially overtired. In these cases, the best solution maybe a rest, and sort out what you need to do in the next morning, once you have recovered.
This may not be easy for everyone. There is often no respite from small children, from the debt collector, and from ongoing family and work problems. It is therefore important to learn different ways of coping with anxiety so that you can take the action you need to solve the problems.
Nonetheless, if you want to improve your mental wellbeing, it has to be your top priority. It won't happen on its own!
Mental wellbeing has two parts, how good or bad you feel and how much energy you have. Anxiety consists of high levels of negative energy. You can improve your energy by improving your diet and cutting down on alcohol. No one makes you eat junk food, and no one makes you drink more than is good for you. Its a life style choice. And the older you get, the more important it is to make the right lifestyle choice to improve your mental wellbeing.
Come along to the workshops on MeetUP, learn more about MoodMapping and how it can help you. The first and second Saturdays each month teach you about moodmapping with a weekly group to offer support
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Copyright (c) Dr. Liz Miller
http://www.moodmapping.com
